Royal Bully Page 5

  Trembling, I waited for him to say something else.

  And then he cupped my chin with his right hand, I could smell blood on him, death lingered in the air. “Are you afraid?”

  I gulped. “Yes.”

  “Don’t be,” he whispered. “It’s just me.”

  “All the blood.” I couldn’t get the shaking out of my voice. His eyes didn’t soften if anything, something else sparked in them, something… that felt evil and wrong so wrong.

  “That’s a natural occurrence when you shoot someone, Claire.”

  I gasped. “You shot someone?”

  “It’s my job,” was what he said through clenched teeth, “I told you what this life was about, you swore your fealty to me, to the family, to this.” He spread his arms wide. “And now you tell me you’re scared? That you can’t handle it? That you can’t handle me?”

  He was shaking.

  Oh God, was this normal?

  “Asher—” I reached for him “—what’s wrong?”

  “Bring me back,” he rasped. “Please…” He tugged at his hair, his eyes looked crazed. “Bring me back, I can’t feel—anything.” His teeth started to chatter, and then he turned on his heel and ran his fist right into the wall, over and over again. I could hear bone breaking as blood splattered all over him, all over me.

  Petrified, I reached for him, my mouth clanged against his and then we were a tangle of limbs as he held me with his good hand as blood dripped between our bodies. He pressed me against the damaged wall, pinning me there with his mouth with his massive body as it shook against mine. I coaxed him, kissed him softly. His breathing was erratic, his pulse the same. He deepened the kiss and then pulled back his eyes calmer, his focus centered on me. “I’m sorry.”

  “What’s going on?”

  “I need you.” His voice was pleading. “So fucking much right now. I need you.” He gritted his teeth and stared down at his bloody hand. “There isn’t an escape. The more I do this, the more I lose myself. My soul isn’t there anymore, it’s barely existing. I don’t know how to find myself anymore.”

  I held onto him for dear life, wondering what I got myself into.

  Wondering how I was supposed to survive if he was already half dead, half gone.

  “I killed my cousin.” Asher’s eyes saddened, “And I have a sick feeling, I’m going to have to do it again.” He bit down on his lower lip.

  “What do you mean?”

  “We all have jobs.” His voice was low, dangerous.

  I was almost afraid to ask. “What’s yours?”

  “I’m the executioner.”

  Stunned, I just stared at him in complete horror and shock my mind reeling. “So, if I ran, after all of this?”

  His nostrils flared. “Please don’t do that to me, to us.”

  “Would you?” It was my turn to be hysterical. “Asher?”

  “We all have jobs.” He repeated. “You should go back to sleep.”

  “And dream of what? You chasing me down with a gun?”

  “Please.” He begged. “Not tonight. Just stay, let me hold you.”

  “You just admitted you would murder me!”

  “Claire, you don’t understand, if I didn’t—-someone else would. That’s what I’m trying to tell you. There is no escape for us. And because I wanted you—I damned you too. What the fuck did I just do?” He tore at his hair again and then pulled away from me. “I’m going to go sleep on the couch.”

  “Asher wait—”

  “—I do love you,” he said in a sad voice. “But not enough to leave you alone… maybe I do take after my dad in more ways than one because he was never willing to sacrifice everything for the girl he fell for—and it seems… history has no choice but to fuck with us over and over again.”

  He slammed the door behind him, leaving me paralyzed in place.

  Rooted to the floor while fresh tears streaked down my face.

  What just happened?

  Chapter Six

  Asher

  I had to get myself under control, but I’d been out of control for a long time, hadn’t I? I just refused to acknowledge how bad it had gotten, how I lost pieces of myself each and every time I saw someone’s soul leave this earth.

  But what other choice did I have?

  It was the job nobody wanted.

  Even Junior didn’t want it, and the guy was even more bloodthirsty than his father, but that’s another story altogether, isn’t it? It seems that no matter how many of us kids try to break away from the sins of our parents…

  We step right back into it.

  Over and over again, like some sick cycle of torture.

  I scared her.

  And part of me needed her scared, I needed her to understand that the Family doesn’t care if you’re ninety or nine, they don’t care if you’re the favorite uncle, cousin, human. Because when you know too much.

  It’s simple.

  You know too much.

  And we were done making an exception.

  Because exceptions meant loose ends, exceptions meant emotions and feelings, and I knew that even though I loved Claire, even though I wanted to keep her, they wouldn’t let me make an exception to the rules of this life.

  She would be a loose end.

  And she would die.

  I just didn’t know how to explain it to her without sounding like a monster. I could hear her tossing and turning in the bed upstairs. I forced myself to go to sleep and felt like I woke up ten minutes later when the sun made an appearance overhead.

  I rubbed my eyes and sat up, making my way into the kitchen to make coffee.

  I stopped when I saw my dad sitting at the breakfast bar already.

  “It’s starting to freak me out how often I’m seeing you these days,” I grumbled, stealing his cup and sipping.

  At least this time I didn’t get a slap on the back of my head.

  The sleeves to his crisp blue and white pinstripe shirt were rolled up past a maze of tattoos that made him stick out in Washington and well, everywhere.

  “We’re not in session.” He sighed. “Got a few weeks left to tie some things up here.”

  I froze, stared him down over my mug. “What aren’t you telling me?”

  “What do you want to know?” His smile didn’t reach his eyes. “She still upstairs?”

  “Either that or she ran for the hills screaming, and I have to go find her, yeah,” I grumbled. “She saw me washing off blood, and I wasn’t…” I squeezed my eyes shut. “The shaking won’t stop. One moment I’m fine and then—”

  “—you’re human.” He interrupted. “Never apologize for being human.”

  “It’s not natural to kill someone you used to play tag with, Dad.” Suddenly exhausted, I sat down next to him.

  He wrapped an arm around me. He’d never been afraid to show physical affection to any of us kids, if anything, I got more hugs than I did slaps. Like he knew the burden he asked us to carry was the hardest thing he would ever do and that hopefully, by keeping that human connection, we wouldn’t lose ourselves to the darkness.

  “What are you really worried about?”

  I gulped. “Her leaving. Having to—well, let’s just start with her leaving. I mean we’ve known each other for two months; I knew it the minute I saw her, she was mine.”

  He listened intently. “And now?”

  “And now I feel like I’ve fucking ruined her life.”

  “I could make it all go away.” He sighed. “Sergio could help, but people would know. Andrei tries his best to keep a tight leash on everyone and everything, but we have people just waiting for us to crumble, to fall apart, people willing to do anything and use anyone in order to do it. She doesn’t understand that our enemies would love nothing more than to hurt her. There is no normal, and since she’s related…”

  “Shit.” I rubbed my face with my hands. “That’s why you weren’t pissed?”

  “She’s one of us. She has no choice son, had you not fallen ass first in love with her, we would have still had to bring her into the Family, you really think Nikolai would have let her stay unprotected that long? I know you hate school, but she’s got Petrov blood, which means she will always be in danger from not just our enemies, but theirs as well. You know that the Russian dynasty is still pissed that Andrei, the last remaining heir, joined our side. His blood is both Italian and Russian. The fact that Claire’s running around means she has a target on her back no matter what.”

  “Fucking Andrei,” I growled. “He just had to go straight.”

  Dad smiled. “Say that to his face and get back to me.”

  “Hilarious, last time I teased him about shit, he broke my nose.”

  “He’s young still.” Dad shrugged.

  “What does that make you? Ancient?”

  “Careful, I could still kick your ass.” He gleamed and then grabbed me by the neck and kissed my cheek. “Go explain to her, then get ready for school.”

  I groaned. “Still?”

  “It’s time,” was all he said.

  “Shit, are you serious? It’s time?”

  “The Elect.” He gave me a somber look. “You always knew it would happen with you, with the five eldest kids, the five strongest kids. It’s time to take your places.”

  “Hah, can I be the one to tell Serena?”

  We’d been at Eagle Elite flying under the radar, but now he was asking us to rise up, to become the Elect, to run the school with brutality and ruthlessness. I knew what it looked like because not so long ago, my dad had done the same.

  “She threw a fucking chair through the window, and Junior had to lock her in the bathroom to calm her down,” Dad said with a wince bringing me back to the present.

  My eyes searched his, did he know? Did
he suspect? Last night after everything had happened, I found them together, kissing, nearly naked, and I covered for them because I was petrified of what the bosses would do. “Dad…”

  He looked away. “Leave it.”

  “But—”

  “—I said, leave it. They’re young, you’re all young, just hope like hell it’s sex and nothing more, because if Nixon ever finds out… if Phoenix—” He actually paled. “I wouldn’t make you, you know? I’d do it myself if I had to, but I wouldn’t make you do that to your best friends.”

  “It could start a war,” I whispered.

  “One we can’t afford.” He agreed. “Well, then, fix it.” He slapped me on the back.

  “You kidding me right now?” How the hell was I supposed to tell them not to keep having sex? Both Junior and Serena were older than me, and on top of that, the way he looked at her. It was otherworldly.

  “Nah,” He grinned. “Like I said, you’re all young, emotions are hot, tempers are hotter, make it so they hate each other so much that they can’t bear the sight of one another.”

  “And how do you suppose I do that?” My stomach sank.

  “Make it look real,” he said in a sad voice. “So real that she doesn’t come back from it, that he’s scarred for life.” He looked up as Claire made her way down the stairs. “It can be your girlfriend’s first job with you.”

  I flinched as my jaw clenched from grinding my teeth. “You want me to destroy them?”

  “No, son, I want you to break their hearts.”

  When dad left, the small kitchen in the guest house fell quiet, Claire was making coffee. I went around her and hugged her from behind, my head rested on hers. “You okay?”

  “It’s a bit weird how often your dad stops by when sex is involved.” She sighed, I loved seeing her in my giant white t-shirt, but what was better was the fact that she wasn’t running away screaming… yet.

  I grinned. “Yeah, well, he’s just got really shit timing.”

  “You’re telling me.” She sighed, I could feel the tension in her entire body as she stood there, facing the backyard, our reflections in the window stared right back. She lifted her head and stared at me through the glass. “Tell me it’s going to be okay.”

  “It’s going to be okay,” I said quickly. “And I’ll do everything in my power to make it that way for both of us.”

  “I’m scared.”

  “Really? Because I wake up with sunshine sprouting from my ass—newsflash Claire, we are all fucking scared, and that’s a good thing because when you lose your fear, you lose your humanity. Embrace that fear, it’s what keeps us mortal.”

  “How’d you get so smart?”

  “Hugs, not drugs?” I laughed.

  She turned in my arms and pressed a kiss to my chin. “I’m going to go get a shower, wanna join me?”

  I eyed her long, lean legs beneath my shirt and let out a groan. “I wish I could, but I have to go check on something, all right? I’ll be like ten minutes; maybe if I run, I can wash your back.”

  “Is that code word for sex?”

  “One hundred percent.” I nodded.

  She stood up on her tiptoes to kiss me again, this time on the mouth, her coffee cup between us and I thought, damn, I would do anything to just have a simple life like this, without the blood, without the tears, without the fear that clung to us like a choking fog.

  I kissed her back, promising myself I would do everything in my power to make this work, to keep that smile on her face, and then turned and made my way back into the main house.

  Junior should be home.

  As should Serena.

  But it had been a super late night, so I figured they probably stayed the night as per usual, most of the time we crashed in the theater room, at least pre-Claire.

  I didn’t tell my dad that I knew things about Junior and Serena, that I suspected as much, that they had been dancing around each other for a long time and that I was the one that had to keep a secret about the way they looked at each other.

  But this time, this time, I hoped they’d ended it, I hoped my dad was right, and hormones were just doing what hormones did. Fucking.

  So when I quietly made my way into the main house and walked down the hall, I prayed I was wrong, when I slowly opened the door to the theater room and saw that the end credits to some horror movie were still rolling, I exhaled in relief.

  That is until I heard moaning.

  And saw a naked foot.

  A leg.

  And then I saw them.

  Again.

  Junior held Serena in his lap as she moved on top of him, her hair drawn to the side.

  Shit.

  My cousin was with Junior Nicolasi, and it wasn’t a fling. A fling was one night, this was multiple nights.

  “Love you,” he whispered.

  “You’re everything.” She panted back.

  If I didn’t do something asap.

  Both of my best friends were going to get caught and die.

  “As long as we both shall live.” I heard Junior whisper gruffly.

  Serena clung to him and repeated it back.

  I almost hurled in the corner of the room, but made it back out into the hall and leaned against the closed door.

  The dads would freak.

  It wasn’t allowed, but more than that, the Abandonato princess with the Nicolasi prince? It was a death sentence.

  They didn’t know what I did.

  They didn’t know the bad blood that was swept under the rug, perfumed, and ignored. Shit, they didn’t know anything.

  But this? This was the worst possible scenario. The main bosses would have overlooked a one-night stand, not this, shit, not this.

  It was beyond infatuation, wasn’t it?

  It was real.

  Which meant I had to make it appear real.

  And I was going to break their hearts, break their love, so I wouldn’t have to point a gun at both of them and say goodbye.

  I’d rather them hate each other for the rest of their lives, hate me.

  Then lose them.

  My hands shook as I walked down the hall and back outside to the pool house. The shower was still on when I reached the stairs.

  And when I pulled back the glass door, dropped my clothes, and got in, Claire was there with a warm smile and open arms.

  I could almost forget the death sentence on my best friends’ heads if we didn’t do this, so I kissed her hard, and then told her exactly what had to be done while she listened.

  Chapter Seven

  Claire

  “You want me to help you do what?” I asked with shaky hands as I zipped up my Eagle Elite skirt and grabbed my black blazer. It felt so foreign, wearing my uniform like everything was normal, like I couldn’t still smell the blood on Asher. It had magically been dropped off at the house an hour ago, along with all the things I needed to get ready in the morning, like a creepy miracle. Huh, mafia.

  I looked up, Asher was staring down at me with something in his eyes, I realized I’d seen ever since the first day we met.

  Guilt and want, all tangled together in one tantalizing package that I’d taken, opened, consumed, and damned myself with.

  “Claire.” He ran a hand down my shoulder, and then pulled me into his embrace, lowering his dark head, he kissed me softly and then flicked his tongue with mine, I moaned in response, because even though there was blood on his hands, he still had the ability to make me want him, even though every single part of me knew that this man kissing me, would rather kill me than let anyone else do it.

  Even though I knew that damning truth.

  I still kissed him back.

  I never understood the expression of a guy tasting like bad choices, like sin—but in that moment I felt it in my soul as his lips moved across mine, as his tongue massaged and sucked me deeper and deeper, there would be a point in my life where he would ask for more than I could give him.

  And the thought was terrifying.

  His eyes were dark when he pulled away; they stared right through me, so intense I wanted to shy away; instead, I met his gaze. “Claire, I’m not asking a lot, it will be easy, besides… the alternative isn’t exactly my favorite option.”

  “The alternative meaning you get to go on a killing spree?” The words flew out of my mouth, he flinched as each seemed to launch themselves at his impenetrable armor. “I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be.” He licked his lips like he could still taste me there, like he was making a point of it. “Especially when it’s true.”