All Stars Fall Page 5

  On my music.

  Penelope squeezed Bella’s hand.

  I gripped my fork so hard I half expected it to bend in my palm. Bella deserved that, all three of them deserved that.

  Someone to make them pot roast.

  Someone to wipe their faces.

  They had me, but I wanted them to have more. They deserved to have everything, and I didn’t know how to do that, at least not while I was still figuring out what it meant to be a single dad with three kids under the age of seven.

  “Did you guys have fun today?” I asked, standing and picking up dishes to go wash in the sink.

  “Yes!” Bella shouted first. “And we had juice!”

  “Best day ever,” I teased while Eric gave a little eye roll and shrugged. At least he was eating. He didn’t have much of an appetite, and I knew it was because he missed his mom.

  Anger was his way of dealing with things.

  He was so like me, it was painful to watch.

  I had always had music to ground me, though, music to escape. Eric had no interest in music. He loved video games, which meant I basically had no even playing ground since I hated anything to do with social media and TV. I gave them a little screen time during the day, but I wanted them to be kids, to run outside, play, get dirty, build a treehouse.

  Supervised, but still.

  “You seem lost in your thoughts,” Penelope whispered as she joined me by the sink and started drying the plates as I handed them to her. “Did everything go okay at the studio?”

  I almost dropped the plate. “Wow, first pot roast, now you’re asking about my day?”

  I didn’t mean to sound like a jackass, but that was exactly how it came out.

  She squeezed her eyes shut like she was in pain and took a deep breath. “Sorry, that’s not…you know what, I should go.” With shaky hands, she set the plate down. Her smile was forced as she said goodbye to the kids and promised to see them the next day.

  And I stood at the sink like a dick for another ten minutes before grabbing a few board games for the kids and setting them up at the kitchen table with ice cream.

  Once they were all settled with Guess Who, I grabbed my phone and walked into the living room.

  Me: I’m sorry. That came out wrong.

  I could tell she was typing.

  Why the hell was I sweating?

  Maybe because she was beautiful, and I’d been ignoring that fact for the last twenty-four hours even while I was caught staring at her during dinner.

  Maybe because I’d lashed out.

  I groaned and ran a hand through my messy hair.

  Penelope: That’s okay. I don’t want you to think I’m intruding on your family in any way. Boundaries are good. I’ll be more professional, I promise.

  Shit.

  I didn’t want professional.

  I wanted…

  If the guys could see me now.

  I wanted a damn adult friend.

  I wanted someone I could talk to about my kids.

  I was…lonely.

  Funny how you can be surrounded by fame, fortune, people shouting your name, and you still feel like the most isolated person on the planet.

  Me: God no, please don’t. If one more person smiles at me and tells me it’s going to be okay I’m going to lose my mind. I need more adult friends who aren’t happy bandmates or people who want something from me. Sorry, overshare.

  Penelope: That’s not an overshare. And I get you. I just moved here, remember?

  Me: Is this the point in the conversation that I ask if we can maybe hang out? As adults sometime? Not a date.

  Great, I really was going to die alone with my drumsticks clutched in my hand. Music would be my mistress. Fantastic. The guys always did tease me about music being more important than anything.

  But they didn’t know. It was the only thing that never let me down. It was my constant. I needed it like I needed air to survive.

  Penelope: Hah don’t worry I’m a good adult friend. I’m an even better friend because I won’t hit on you. I don’t date famous people. I don’t want anything to do with the spotlight. I’ve seen what Dani goes through. I mean, not that you’d be interested. That came out wrong. My turn to apologize…

  I grinned down at my phone.

  Me: You mean you didn’t have a poster of me in your bedroom when you were fourteen? I’m almost insulted.

  Penelope: I may never show my face again. Guilty. One poster, but I was more of an Andrew girl.

  Me: You’re fired.

  Penelope: But the drummer and sometimes lead vocalist did have a really great…

  I could have sworn I started to sweat. What was I? A teenager again? Not that I’d even dated much, I was too petrified I’d somehow knock up a groupie or end up in the tabloids.

  Me: Great?

  Penelope: Beat ;) He had a great beat, nice hair too, teeth—

  Me: Are you trying to bruise my ego?

  Penelope: Is it working?

  Me: No, not really. I saw you staring at my abs today.

  Penelope: OMG who just changes in front of strangers! You deserved that! I didn’t know where to look, okay?

  I burst out laughing.

  “Dad? Someone here?” Eric called.

  “No, no, sorry just, something funny….on Facebook,” I lied.

  “Can you come help us? Bella wants to keep playing, but she keeps guessing wrong on purpose.”

  “Do not!” Bella yelled.

  “Do too!” the boys said in unison.

  I sighed.

  Apparently I was done texting a beautiful woman.

  Shit.

  A beautiful woman who was watching my kids.

  Who I had no business involving myself with.

  Who had just agreed to be my platonic friend.

  I quickly typed out a message so she wouldn’t think I’d left her hanging.

  Me: Kids are calling and sorry about changing in front of you. Next time I’ll ask permission. Not that there will be a next time. I think I need a re-do of this conversation. See you tomorrow, Penny.

  I didn’t realize until I was lying in bed that night, with Bella and her black T-shirt on my right and Malcom on my left with his purple teddy and Eric with his mouth open snoring..

  We’d already given her a nickname.

  And it had only been two days.

  A handful of hours.

  And for some stupid reason I refused to rationalize, I fell asleep with a smile on my face.

  Chapter Seven

  Penelope

  The next day at the coffee shop, I found myself checking my phone like someone obsessed.

  It wasn’t even that I was expecting him to text me.

  It was one hundred percent that I wanted him to.

  That I liked talking with him.

  And that was a problem.

  I decided to text my best friend Fallon from back home. Maybe she’d at least have some stellar advice even if the advice was for me to stop acting like a teenager waiting for a phone call.

  Me: So I may be working for someone famous, not the plan, remember the band Adrenaline?

  Fallon wasted no time.

  Fallon: TELL ME EVERYTHING, and I thought you were working at a coffee shop. In fact you sent me a picture of you at that very coffee shop yesterday morning? Did you quit? Why aren’t you keeping me updated? Also if you don’t respond asap you’re dead.

  Ugh I missed her so much.

  Me: I may be working for Trevor Wood as a part time nanny before his kids start school and I may have said yes without thinking and now I’m staring at my phone like I’m more than the hired help and I’m one day in.

  Fallon: Trevor Wood. The Trevor Wood? Hottest drummer alive? Six pack for days? That Trevor Wood?

  Me: Yes, focus! We texted a bit last night and, he was flirty, I was flirty…

  Fallon: Aw, did he pass you a note in biology too? Maybe you guys can play MASH later!

  I rolled my eyes and smiled down a
t the house, car, and vacation emoji.

  Me: Very funny. I need you to virtually slap me so I stop overthinking this. I’m the nanny. That’s it.

  Fallon: Consider yourself slapped, you’re the nanny but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be open to something more…adventurous. I mean that is why you abandoned us, isn’t it? You needed a change of scenery and God in his mysterious ways gave you Trevor Wood! Bitch.

  I laughed out loud.

  Me: So…just roll with it?

  Fallon: I want notes at the end of every day. Or I’m killing you.

  Me: I miss you.

  Fallon: I miss you too. Facetime later?

  Me: Yes please.

  Fallon: Preferably when you’re at work, I wouldn’t be mad.

  Me: Signed an NDA so not a word!

  Fallon: My lips are sealed. Love you.

  Me: You too.

  I set my phone down and sighed. This was ridiculous. And I knew better than to even be tempted by him.

  After all, famous people were a big no in my family. I saw what Dani had to sacrifice just to have a normal life, and all I’d ever really wanted was an adventure, to settle down, not suddenly crush on a rock star and his three kids.

  If only he wasn’t so sexy.

  Or good with his kids.

  His hands.

  Ugh, I was torturing myself, wasn’t I? I’d even started playing the band’s last album while I got ready that morning. I almost tripped and face planted against the toilet when one of the songs came on that he sang.

  His voice was like velvet and rasp all mixed up with perfect pitch.

  Not that I was an expert, but I’d always loved the way he sang, as if all that mattered was him and the song, nothing else.

  Jennifer had left a note that she was going to be out running errands, and the day had started off pretty busy, which again was surprising for a small town like Seaside.

  I had about an hour before I needed to be at Trevor’s house when the bell chimed.

  “Be right with—” I gawked. “DANI!”

  “HEY!” She rushed toward me. Lincoln, her husband, stood behind her with a giant grin on his face. The guy had a hat on and sunglasses, but any idiot could tell it was Lincoln Greene, A-list actor. He was too good looking to go unnoticed, and people knew he had a beach house here along with every other friggin’ celebrity, it seemed.

  “I thought you guys were staying in LA for a while.” I loved Dani so much, she was just good, one of those people you want to be around, like she couldn’t help but be the kindest person you’ve ever met.

  “About that.” She bit down on her lower lip and then burst out, “I’m pregnant!”

  “WHAT?!” I shrieked. “That’s amazing!”

  She was young, like really young in my mind. She and Lincoln had fallen for each other a little over a year ago, and at eighteen, she had decided that he was it, and they were going to get married.

  The rest was history.

  But when you know, you know.

  “I know!” She winked back at Lincoln. “It wasn’t really in the plan yet, but I’m super excited. We wanted to lay low and celebrate where we first met, so we invited the gang to hang out for the next two weeks starting with an insane barbecue tonight! Can you make it?”

  “Um…” Did I tell her about the new job? Technically, I got off in time to actually go, right? “Yeah, that should work.”

  “Your eyes are shifty.” She leaned in. “And you look guilty, like when you got caught behind the bleachers after homecoming.”

  “Okay, first off, you’re the little snitch that was visiting and told my parents I was making out with Pete.” I glared. “And second, aren’t I older than you?”

  “Semantics.” Dani’s eyes narrowed. “Did you meet someone?”

  “In Seaside?” I countered, crossing my arms.

  “Please, it’s like the best place to meet someone. Linc didn’t even stand a chance.”

  “It’s amazing how much she talks now, all things considered,” he teased with a wink in my direction. After her parents died, Dani had become a selective mute. Nobody knew how or why, and it had taken Linc to pull her out of it. He smiled at me again. Damn, she needed to keep the guy on a leash. He was almost as sexy as Trevor.

  And there it was.

  “What was that?” Dani pointed at my face. “You’re thinking of someone.”

  “Huh?” I touched my cheeks with both hands. “Nope, sorry just, had a rush of heat. You know how it is when you get older.”

  Her eyes narrowed. “You’re like twenty-eight.”

  “Twenty-seven,” I corrected. “Can’t I have hot flashes at twenty-seven? Is that not a real thing?” I moved toward the espresso machine, putting objects between us before she figured out what was going on. “So the barbecue sounds fun.”

  “Nice subject change.”

  “Uh-huh.” I grinned. “You want a coffee?”

  “Decaf.” She winked. “But Linc will have a triple shot Irish cream latte with extra foam.”

  My eyebrows shot up. “You know his drink well.”

  “Married.” She laughed. “But I know how he likes everything. Remember I was his assistant for the summer? Best summer of his life.”

  Linc wrapped an arm around her and then nuzzled her neck. “Hell, yeah it was.”

  I tried not to sigh.

  I failed.

  They both gave me a funny look while I clutched the coffee cup to my bosom like I wished it was a baby.

  “Coffee.” I cleared my throat. “Coming right up.”

  By the time Linc and Dani left, I was able to clean up a bit and Jennifer was back to take over the afternoon shift.

  My feet hurt from standing all day, so I put on another pair of Nikes and this time made sure that when I showed up at Trevor’s house I didn’t look homeless or like I was going to start digging through his trash for a snack. I was wearing a pair of black leggings and a cute red hoodie, and my hair was at least washed and pulled back into a sleek ponytail. I figured that as much as I wanted to show up in a gorgeous little black number that showed off my legs, that wouldn’t be exactly the best way to nanny, especially after a day with those kids.

  They were active, to say the least.

  I was just getting ready to knock, giving myself a much needed extra few seconds to suck in oxygen so I didn’t hold my breath in front of him or just gawk for longer than was socially acceptable, when the door jerked open. Trevor stood there, shirtless.

  Again.

  “Um…” I tilted my head and pointed. “Is this going to be a thing? You forgetting that you have muscles and I have eyes?”

  His lips twitched. “In my defense, I was just victimized by three small children and finger paint.”

  “Let me guess, they thought you were a canvas?”

  “Bingo!” He laughed and held the door open wider. “I shouldn’t have confused them by wearing white.”

  “Tsk tsk, you amateur.”

  Trevor threw his head back and laughed. God, even his neck muscles were sexy. Must look anywhere but at the neck muscles and how they bulged above perfectly sculpted trap muscles.

  The house looked pretty tidy, no laundry since I’d folded it the day before. Trevor’s six pack flexed as he moved around the kitchen island then grabbed a black, vintage-looking shirt from the nearby chair and pulled it over his head. It had holes in it, but I think it was on purpose and if not, at least it was clean.

  For being a rock star he was pretty low key about what he wore.

  “All right.” Trevor kissed Bella on the forehead, followed by Malcom and then Eric, who held up his fist for a bump. “Kids, be good for Penny, okay?”

  Did he just drop the nickname again?

  I told my heart to stop making such loud beats against my chest as he finally walked by me with a smile.

  Calm down. It’s not like you get a goodbye kiss too, stupid heart.

  He stopped right in front of me. A foot away. My smile felt too
wide, too forced. This was what I got for staying up late the night before and YouTubing footage from his most recent tour.

  Footage of sweat running down his chest while he tossed his drumsticks into the crowd, footage of him crooning into the microphone as women screamed all around him, holding up posters, flowers, bras.

  Trevor put his hands lightly on my shoulders. “You okay today?”

  “Huh? Me? Yup. I’m great.” I rocked back on my heels. “Sorry, it was just a busy day. Dani’s back in town, and she stopped by…” Why was I even telling him this? It wasn’t like he’d asked about my day.

  I shut up when he grinned at me like I was being cute.

  Right, so cute that I work at a coffee shop and smell like beans.

  “I’m great,” I repeated.

  “Did you need a ride?” he asked.

  “Ride?” What was he talking about? “To?”

  His grin was so sexy I wanted to either kiss him or just take a picture and stare at it later under my covers. I needed to get a grip or I was going to lose touch with reality, wasn’t I?

  And reality was, at this moment, Trevor.

  My job was not to stare at him and daydream, it was to do a job, to take care of his kids, to make sure that the hole their mother left in their hearts hurt less when I was around.

  “The barbecue.” He checked his watch and then looked back up to me. “We’re headed over there too. In fact, I think—”

  The doorbell rang.

  He ran over and opened the door.

  My jaw dropped.

  I needed someone to physically move my chin back up, because while my brain was firing and telling me that it was time to close my mouth—it still refused to do it.

  “Uncle Drew!” Bella went running.

  I nearly died of shock when Drew knelt down, picked up Bella into his arms, and swung her around. Tattoos took up every inch of space down both arms, his ears were pierced, and I’m pretty sure he had a stud in his nose. He was beautiful, massive, and in the living room just, breathing in the same air.

  Trevor laughed. “She’s missed you.”

  “Everyone misses me.” Drew barked out a laugh. “All right, Bells, I gotta go record some music with your dad, but I’ll see you later at the barbecue, okay?”

  “Okay!” She kissed his cheek and then patted where she kissed, her face lit up. “Oh, does that mean that Penny gets to come?”